Crackpot Theories: Switch the drinking and driving ages

Nov 17 | Posted by: Fighter #1 | Tags: Crackpot Theories to save the world

Being as I may have inadvertantly endorsed underage drinking in last week's post, I'd better rationalize it now!

The drinking and driving ages are stupid and should be switched.

Here's my reasoning:
Public transportation is a great idea, right? It's cheap. It's safe. It's good for the environment. It reduces congestion. If it's done right, it's fast and not unpleasant. Sweet deal!
But the odds are good that public transit wherever you live is kind of terrible. It's not very intuitive, and it's really slow. So, of course, you don't use it. You've had a car since you were 16, and it's just plain easier.
Since no one's using it, the bus system doesn't have any money, so it doesn't get any better. It's a pretty severe catch-22.
But what if you didn't have that car? What if you weren't allowed to drive until you turned 21? Everyone between 17 and 20 is going to college or entering the workforce, and they all need to get from point A to B. They'll all be using public transportation. The system has to get better to accommodate them and their money. 
Life is better for everyone!

As to the drinking, well, prohibition doesn't work. Raise your hands everyone who never drank illegally as a teenager! Just me and the two homeschooled kids in the back? OK. Well, that's kind of a dumb law isn't it? Might as well encourage kids to drink responsibly instead of glamorizing it.

Also, if you're a parent, the responsible thing to do is buy your kids a microbrew. Remember, friends don't let friends drink s***ty beer!

Really, though, the most important reason that the drinking age should be lowered is this: Kids should be able to go to shows! Live music is a ton of fun, but there are so many venues that just don't let minors in because it's easier than trying to card everyone at the bar. That just seems like a terrible idea to me. I actively resent the fact that I went to very few shows when I was younger, and I'm appalled that my generation would continue to perpetrate this injustice on the next!

So if you're the shadow president of the USA, listen up! Switch the drinking and driving ages. It'll be awesome, I promise!

Is that really all there is to it becusae that'd be flabbergasting.

Ok somebody put Steve in charge. I remember a few of the bands I missed in college. Totally unfair.

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