It's Time for a Divorce

I could have sworn I’d already written this blog post, but I can’t seem to find it! Oh well. Here goes. (Again?)

Right now, one of the hot topic issues everyone is talking about is, of course, gay marriage. The Supreme Court is reviewing the Defense of Marriage Act and trying to determine if it’s constitutional or not. I find it kind of weird that this issue is still facing so much resistance.

Let’s describe a scenario. Say that you’re an incredibly conservative person and live your life by strict Biblical standards. You believe that all homosexual behavior is sinful; the Bible says it in pretty simple terms. It’s cut and dry.

Here’s the thing though. You still should want the government to allow gay marriages. In fact, you want the government to recognize any marriage between consenting adults, probably even polygamy. From the government’s perspective marriage is a contract. It’s an agreement between two (or more, see “polygamy” earlier) people to share a household. That’s it! Your religion doesn’t enter into it; sex doesn’t enter into it. Your religious beliefs and whether or not you’re sleeping with someone shouldn’t have anything to do with whether or not that person is competent to raise your kids if you die.

The problem is that we insist on inexorably linking all of these things. We insist on acting like marriage is some special religious thing. Sure, the big religious ceremony often occurs at the same time as the signing of the contracts and agreements, but there’s no reason that it has to.

In fact, if your primary concern is protecting the sanctity of marriage, you want these things to be as separate as possible. Gay marriage is going to be legalized eventually. When that happens, churches that refuse to recognize them are going to be viewed as regressive at best, and prosecuted* for discrimination at worst. The very fact that society is shackling these disparate concepts together will eventually have a negative impact on people’s ability to practice their own religion freely.

Our efforts to limit the legal rights of others will only result in threats to our own.

The concepts of marriage as a religious ceremony and a government contract need to be divorced and quickly! Also, this sounds like the makings of a pretty tremendous custody battle! To Judge Judy!


* Precedent says unsuccessfully, but they’d still be taken to court.

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