This is a cover of a Walter Tore's Spontobeat song.

This is a silly remix I did for fun (even though I haven't finished the main mix yet...)

Featuring Ryan McCarthy shouting things and samples from Abstinence's Revolt of the Cyberchrist, Cosmo's Cosmic Adventure, and The Amen Break.

The Hand Jive
Stephen Smith, David Smith
Thanks to Ryan McCarthy

pre 2003

Chorus

A   G       F#    F
See me as I wanna be.
See me as I wanna be.
See me as I wanna be.
D       E                (D E D C)
An ogre sitting in a tree

Verse

A               G          F#           F
              I don't      feel like an ogre
(Born to do the hand jive, baby)
A               B          C        D
           Even though  I  wanna be one
(Born to do the hand jive, baby)

Ogres live a better life,
and they have a lot more fun.

repeat chorus

Verse

One day, I was sitting in a tree;
I saw the ogres passing by.
I knew then what I wanted to be.
If I couldn't I would surely cry.

repeat chorus

I am the Greatest
Stephen Smith

D  G A

                    D    G A
I built the  Hoover Dam
Out of a great, big yam
Stuck together with jam
It's all part of my plan

Chorus

G        A        E
I am the greatest... that ever lived

I saved the human race
from losing face
by sacking the alien base
with nothing but a mace

repeat chorus

solo

[I] traveled the earthly plane
in an aeroplane.
Everyone was vain,
so I went insane.

Repeat chorus

Stephen Smith

Chords
   C  C' G
e  0  1  3
b  1  1  3
g  0  0  0
d  x  x  x
a  x  x  x
d  x  x  x

Intro

C         C'          C                   G
Ooh baby; I love you. I wanna be with you constantly.
Ooh baby; I love you. You're the only one I can see.
Ooh baby; I love you. I wanna be with you all the time
Ooh baby; I love you. Mmmmm   mmm   mmm   lemon-lime.


    E  F#    E F#      E F#  E F#
I'm watching you  everywhere GO!

D B C# A B C#

verse

E F#...

I'm watching you everywhere you go,
you think you can escape my love,
but realize I love you so.
One day I will descend from above.

Chorus

   D            B    C#      A    B                      C#
My love is like a    cobra;  it   strikes with speed and grace.
My love is like re - ality;  it's always    in    your   face.
My love is just like gravity it   can  warp  time   and  space.
F#          A          B               F#
My love is enough to destroy the human race.

Verse

I've loved you since before you knew me.
I love you more than anything.
When I show you love you'll finally see.
All the joy my love can bring.

Chorus

My love is like a loyal dog it misses you when you're gone.
My love is like eternity; [it] goes on and on and on.
My love is like a chess game where we are both just pawns.
My love is stronger than a horde of demon spawn.

Bridge

D B C# A B C#
My love!
My love!
My love!
F#      A       B    F#
It will kill us both

Repeat bridge and chorus

Stephen Smith

intro

G#m  F# B
          The day is mine.
          'cause I have a spine
          It'll be just fine
          The day is mine
|: G#m F# B :|(3x total) G#m

verse

G#m                               E    F#
Waited my whole life for this    moment
Hid from the good guys 'til this moment
As my plans finally fall into    their place
G#m                       E                F#
As they crawl in, it will blow up in their face

chorus

G#m F# B G#m
             The day is mine.
             I'm the only one who has a -
spine        It'll be just fine.
             The day is mine.
|: G#m F# B :|(3x total) G#m

I'll finally claim ownership of the planet.
All along that's how I did plan it.
Nothing can stop me now not even my fool...
assistants; though they screw up, it will be cool.

chorus solo (same as chorus)

Now you lie there strapped to the table.
You'd escape and save the world if you were able.
But as the laser slowly points towards you.
You realize there's nothing that you can do, your life is through!

chorus (with a break in the center)

by Stephen Smith
Thanks to Mr. Corbett and Chaucer
 
Verse:
D                D#               D  F                     D D# D F
Bob                                    was a clown
Each day he stood there trying to juggle.
 
Each night, he fled 'cross the Mexican border.
To steal the fruit that he loved to smuggle.
 
Bob's second job
Was lucrative 'til one night in December
Bob's truck hit a fat old red man
Who seemed familar, but Bob couldn't remember.
 
Chorus:
             C
Santa is dead
                                 Bb
We killed him with our words
             C#
Santa is dead,
                                     C
And now he's food for the birds
 
verse:
Suddenly deer rushed out of the forest
Knocked over Bob's truck and dragged him out
Then they cursed him for killing their leader
with their shiney sharp horns they threw Bob about
 
repeat chorus
 
verse:
This is the end of my sad story
though it is quite tragic, it's also true
no, Virginia there is no Santa Claus
He was burned and scattered and the reindeer rendered into glue
 
repeach chorus twice

There's a story behind this one.  One day Stephen heard a song that 
used the "maudlin."  He said to himself, "boy! That's a good word!  
There sure are a lot of good words for sadness!" More or less.  

He then went home and wrote a song about how the words for sadness are 
very poetic.  He then took a step back and said, "Man that's awfully 
angsty... I should write a song to go along with this one that takes the
 opposite viewpoint.  Or better yet..."  

Steve proceeded to record the song and send it on to Wurm for him to 
record his parts, but he didn't send the whole song!  He only sent the 
underlying drums and guitars.  He kept the vocals and lead guitars to 
himself.  Then he said, "Wurm, can you write a song that's the opposite 
of 'the words for sadness are the most poetic'?" 

"Sure!" said Wurm.  Wurm proceeded to write the most ridiculously joyous
 and upbeat song ever and sent it back to Steve.  It even has a piano 
solo!

The two songs were then fused together into one awesome hybrid song that
 was largely written with any given member of the band having no idea 
what was going on.  Now it's here for your enjoyment.  Over-the-top 
angst and massive, bubbling joy both with a thin veneer of sesquipedantism just for good measure!
Check it out!  The most confusing RatF tab/lyrics sheet yet!..



Chorus



G                             D   

The words for sadness are the most poetic: 

You fill me up with           pure delight! We're 

Em                         C

maudlin, listlessness, and ennui.

going strong; it          feels so right.



Depression, dejection, anguish, devastation; 

I wrote this poem just for you, now 

bleak black hopelessness and apathy.

please just answer me with "I do!"



Verse



G               C 

One day I looke up and saw the

This gaiety     will not end as 

Em                       D                 

sun.

long as you're with me, my friend!



The clouds are that much darker for the

This felicity is ours tonight - 



fact

this delectation makes my heart burn bright!



The distance between two and one is

When you're with me it's euphoria; 



one

it's almost phantasmagoria.



My thesaurus knows all the words I

And each time that we do kiss - be 



lack

still my heart, I'm filled with bliss!



Chorus



The water levels rise to smother joy.

You make me jovial when I'm sad; when you are here, I'm always glad.

Poetry rains down in purple prose.

When you're near in spirit, it makes me blithe, I'm most ecstatic when you arrive.

Pain enough for each girl and boy

When we're together you give me cheer, I'm satisfied that you are near.

Alliteration live to love our lows

This love of ours has stood the test of time - I am yours, and you are mine!



Solo / Bridge

G                    D             Em    C

One day I'll grow    out of this   phase.

of crying over       my nights and days.

When chemicals reach e-qui-li-  brium

What will I          sing about    then...



Chorus



Bridge/Chorus

Stephen Smith (written sometime in the 90s)

intro

A F A Bb
         They're coming after me
         They're out to get me.
         You should be worried too.
A F A Bb                  F   F
         'cause they will get you
|: A F A Bb :|

chorus

C        G                        Am    (bend)
The   conspiracy to ruin my       life.
Lead my  friends like the piper's fife.
cut everything away with a        knife.
The   conspiracy to ruin my       life.

verse

C   G   Am       F

All day and everywhere
I see their presence all around me.
My best-laid plans fall to pieces
Their agents could be anybody.

repeat chorus

verse

they blast my home with a death ray
when I'm enjoying some peace and silence
Everything's gone for a mile around me.
I barely escape the carnage and violence.

repeat chorus

verse

I'd be glad to meet their demands
if they'd just tell me what they wanted.
I'd make it up, whatever insult
if I knew how I'd affronted.

repeat chorus 2x repeat intro as ending.

Netdev Sucks
Stephen Smith
3.17.09
Thanks to Full Disclosure, DDI-VRT Team, esp. Mike Cotton

Verse
C                              G                      Am    G  F
Checked my mail this morning admired the  signal  to  noise.
A scintilating  convo 'bout  browser bugs between the boys

And Urleet had nobody to cuss out for being a noob.
The grammar was impeccable; what's a poor troll to do? (when)

Chorus
C                 G                       C        F
Netdev sucks! And one   day   MI6   will  kill him.
Netdev sucks! And I'll be glad to see him go

Netdev sucks! There are no articles on MSN.com
That need to be Fully Disclosed.

verse:
MD5s and hashes and release candidates.
Calls for white papers for conferences; it makes me sick.
It is with great sadness that I go back to work.
Someone killed the noise; someone is a jerk. ('cause)

Chorus:
Netdev sucks! And one day MI6 will kill him.
Netdev sucks! And I'll be sad to see him go.
Netdev sucks! There are no articles on news.google.com
That need to be Fully Disclosed

Bridge
C              Am                 F                G
Andrew Wallace hack  the  planet; how we need your expertise.
Andrew Wallace we need your help; save us from the script-kiddies

Chorus/Solo
Netdev sucks!

Verse
Checked my mail this morning, and James bond had rooted my box.
He left me a message that said, "we need to have this talk."
"Netdev is a threat that we must address"
"He's been posting links to publicly-disclosed state secrets" ('cause)

Chorus:
Netdev sucks! And one day MI6 will kill him.
Netdev sucks! And I'll be sad to see him go.
Netdev sucks! There are no articles on bbc.uk
That need to be Fully Disclosed

The Zombie Dog version, recorded summer 2009 at Into the Hill Studios by Gregory Tanacea.

Back in 2009, my brother Dave and I (Steve) put together a band called Zombie Dog.We practiced for three weeks, then spent two months driving around, playing shows. Along the way, we picked up a random bassist named Gene. Our adventures are chronicled in the Zombie Dog band blog.

The band was in some ways a proto-Regdar and the Fighters, so I've uploaded a handful of our songs. Some of which you may recognize.

The Zombie Dog version, recorded summer 2009 at Into the Hill Studios by Gregory Tanacea.

Back in 2009, my brother Dave and I (Steve) put together a band called Zombie Dog.We practiced for three weeks, then spent two months driving around, playing shows. Along the way, we picked up a random bassist named Gene. Our adventures are chronicled in the Zombie Dog band blog.

The band was in some ways a proto-Regdar and the Fighters, so I've uploaded a handful of our songs. Some of which you may recognize.