Crackpot theories to save the world! Drinking and Driving

Dec 21 | Posted by: Fighter #1 |

Note: The views expressed in this blog post are merely the views of the author and do not neccessarily reflect the views of Regdar or any of the other fighters.

Other note: Thanks to Dave for introducing me to the phrase "crackpot theories."

I'm a fan of public transit. It's a cheap and environmentally conscious way to get around a city, and if the system is good, it's pretty convenient and comfortable too. I'm also a fan of responsible drinking. It's good times, and research has shown that* moderate alcohol consumption is good for you. Thus I feel it's important to get people using public transit more and drinking responsibly more.

"How are these two related," you say? Well, here's my proposition. In the US, you can get a driver's license at 16 and start drinking legally at 21. I think we should switch those numbers. Here's how I picture things working:

A lot of people start their irresponsible drinking habits in high school where if you want to try alcohol, the only option seems to be get your hands on as much of whatever is cheapest/available and binge in a cow pasture with no adult supervision. If the drinking age was 16, you'd have a lot more teens going out with their friends or family and having a beer or two in public with bartenders who know to cut them off. Sure some people will still binge drink in cow pastures, but they're the ones who'll be getting alcohol poisoning and dropping out of the gene pool, so everyone wins! (Well... except for the dead kids...) Make teenage drinking legal and acceptable, and it's much more likely to be safe.

Raising the driving age to 21 has a variety of benefits. First of all, it gets those stupid, drunk teenagers off the roads. Second of all, it forces reliance on public transit. You'll have a bunch of 17-20 year olds who are just starting careers or going to college moving out of their parents' houses who suddenly don't have access to cars. They'll have to take buses, trains, and what not for most of their day-to-day travel. This will force them to learn how those systems work and get into the habit of using them. Sure, some of them will start driving exclusively when they hit 21, but a lot won't. (They'll still be broke college students after all.) This will also force cities to develop better public transit infrastructure. A significant part of the workforce and economy will require it. 

Obviously, there will have to be exceptions. If you live out in the middle of nowhere, it's not feasible to run a bus out there, so maybe a driver's license would be ok for you, but in general, I think it's a good idea, and I've used way too many clauses in this sentence.

There! That's my crackpot theory that will save the world! Lawmakers, I hope you're paying attention. I can't vote on this thing (Canadian and all), but in case you haven't noticed. I have a blog. On the Internet. I'm kind of a big deal.

* "Research has shown that" is just a more clever way to to say "It has become known that." Which is, in turn, just a clever way of saying "I've read that." Which is itself just a clever way of saying "I've heard that." **

** Unless, of course, you cite your sources.  Also, yes, I did steal that from Douglas Adams. All my cleverest ideas are blatantly stolen from smart guys named Adams.

This is brilliant.

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